Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Dear Santa

I think you may need to flip a coin on me before you try to squeeze down my wood stove pipe. In my defense, it's been a rough year. So here's the list, and you figure out where I fell short:

I bought a house and fixed it up (Nice)
I did not volunteer in soup kitchens, homeless shelters, missions or other helpful causes (Naughty)
I lost my temper a lot (Naughty)
I remained involved in my church (Nice)
I often let my inner monologue criticize the tackily dressed, hypocritical, should have been barred at the door, people in church (Naughty)
I got a puppy from the shelter, whom I love (Nice)
I did not get around to curing cancer or organizing world peace (Naughty, or is it negligent?)
I did not get off my tail to try and get published, but I started a blog (your call)
I did not learn to ride a horse, although I have a friend who offered to teach me (no idea where that falls)
I killed as many plants as I grew (your call, but in my defense, I didn't really kill them, but rather Nehi ate them. So maybe this one should go on her Naughty/Nice list)
I read a lot of books (Nice, literacy is nice right?)
I lost a couple of friends. Not like "Oops, where did I put them?" but more like "I got tired of being the only one to call or email and not getting any response so I gave the frak up" (Probably Naughty. I used frak so that's gotta be naughty right?)
I did however make up with an old friend (Nice)
I only started recycling this year (Naughty)
But I also started composting (Nice)
I prayed for strength and patience daily (Nice)
I rarely had aforementioned patience (Naughty)
I sent out tacky Christmas cards to all my friends (not sure where that one falls either)
I sent care packages to seminarians (Nice)
But never on time for whatever holiday they were for (Again, Naughty or negligent?)

So there it is, the year in review. Do as you will. There will be cookies for you and carrots for the reindeer regardless.

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